Change-1If we don’t learn good habits, life becomes more difficult.  We have a choice:

Get hard on ourselves so life becomes easier, or get easy on ourselves resulting in life getting harder.

Successful people choose good habits over a stagnate life.  At first it might not seem like you are accomplishing much – but don’t be fooled.

“Small hinges open big doors.”

Not all good habits are created equal.  Some are more powerful than others.  Here are 4 power habits that will strengthen your confidence, help you get what you want, and result in a satisfying journey.

  1. Embracing Life vs. Resisting Life.  When things aren’t working, our first action is often resistance.  Instead of resisting, take a moment to consider.  What is not working, and why is it not working?  This kind of information is valuable.

Tough times can be used to disrupt stagnate patterns in thinking.

If we embrace the disruption it can have a “purifying” effect that knocks off the rust and barnacles we naturally collect on our daily voyage.  Embracing life is resisting stagnation.

Life may wreck your plans when your plans are about to wreck you.

Pay close attention.

  1. Affirming Yourself vs. Degrading Yourself.  One of the most common ways to degrade ourselves is to ask the wrong questions.  Wrong questions are disempowering.  They immediately change our subconscious thought patterns from positive to negative, or vice versa.  They are powerful!

Question: “Why can’t I lose weight?”  Answer: “Because you’re a pig!”

Question: “Why can’t I do things right?”  Answer: “Because you’re not smart!”

Question: “Why am I so broke?”  Answer: “Because you’re a loser!”

Ask a bad question and you’ll get a bad answer.  This is how our subconscious mind works.  Since the conscious mind programs the subconscious — take charge.  Good questions lead to productive answers.

What are the top 2 things I can do to lose weight?”

“What is a better way to do this?”

“What are 3 things I can do to increase my cash flow?”

Asking the right question is empowering.

  1. Brainstorming vs. Blame-storming .  Blame-storming is using our creative abilities to come up with reasons why something is not our fault.  This creates an emotional roadblock to healthy living called resentment. It comes from the Latin “re” and “sentire” , “to feel over and over again.”  It’s almost exclusively internalized which makes it different from anger even though it can accompany the emotion.

It’s tempting to wallow in because it gives off a feeling of control.  Yet that is an illusion.  The past is no more.  There is no control.  How can we disempower the past from stealing the present?  Through brainstorming you come to the realization that your past deepens you, but does not define you, deter you, or defeat you.

It is a part of your maturity, but not your identity.

It has made you stronger for today.  You are not a prisoner of your past.  You are a pioneer of your future. And you have power in the present.

  1. Doing Something vs. Doing Everything.  It’s good to be resilient –- to a point.  Sometimes quitting is the smartest thing to do.  There are times when I look at my “to do” list and complete one or two of the items quickly – just by eliminating them! For example, if I have 10 things on my list, Pareto’s Principle reminds me that 80% of my results comes from 20% of my effort.  Let me get those top 2 done first and I’ll go from there.  To not do this is to spread myself too thin.  Time to prune the list.

The secret of concentration is elimination.

 This leads to productive living and has health benefits as well -– a needed message for a society of high achievers!

In Think like a Freak: The authors of Freakonomics Offer To Retrain Your Brain, people who quit unattainable goals saw physical and psychological benefits:

  • Less depressive symptoms and negative affect
  • Lower cortisol levels
  • Lower systemic inflammation
  • Better immune functioning
  • Fewer physical health problems over time

This is not a polemic for a carefree life!   The happiest people are busy, but in control.  They are not rushed.

“Be quick, but not in a hurry.”  Coach John Wooden

It’s a matter of control.  You can do anything when you quit trying to do everything.


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2 Responses
  1. I like the bit of asking the right questions.It instantly opened my eyes to the reason why one of my ventures has not been doing well. I kept asking myself all defeating questions and surely I got the wrong answers. Now I know how to question self. Thank you

  2. Mick Ukleja

    Steve, Thanks for your comments. When we start listening to ourselves more objectively, we give ourselves better insight. This becomes a skill we can get better at doing, and with practice any skill improves.

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